Thank God for the Second (Second) Chance
FINALLY!
The Love Grace & Light blog is back again! I say “again” because the one I previously had got destroyed earlier this year. Five years of blog posts. GONE. What’s interesting is that I wasn’t as sad as I thought I would be about it. If anything, I was more shocked when I found out how badly destroyed it got. However, I looked at it as a way for me to start over for many reasons.
Blogging for me has certainly been… an adventure. I’ve had some high moments and some tumultuous ones. To be honest, I wasn’t sure if I was going to return to the blog again after it being destroyed. In the past few years of me blogging, I didn’t find it enjoyable. I found it stressful and a burden.
I knew that God had wanted me to do this. I just couldn’t understand why and how it became so difficult. Of course, I can blame the devil because I can say that he did have his hand in some of it. The spiritual warfare to continue blogging was definitely real. I really had to fight… but I’ll be honest. I got tired.
So, I quit…again. (Side note: I actually had a blog back in 2015 that was an epic fail but I usually don’t talk about that)
On top of dealing with warfare, life was life-ing real hard and I realized too that my heart had changed. I became focused on myself and not about the others who were hungry for some kind of godly encouragement or hope. This required me to take accountability for my attitude and actions especially since God was still continuing to call me to blog even after I quit.
So, part of me losing my previous blog was my fault. I neglected it and overtime, it broke beyond repair. Hey, if you don’t do the assignment, you don’t get a passing grade.
After dealing with the moderately painful loss of my previous blog, I realized that this was a time to refocus and center my heart on what TRULY mattered. I wanted to make sure that IF I WERE to return back to blogging again, I wouldn’t rely on myself and my strength, talents, gifts but rely on God to help me and steward well what He’s given me. I’d to run this blog the way that it was always meant to be.
This meant me learning how to surrender.
The word “surrender” has become my word for the year and the journey to surrendering more and more to God has been a challenging one. But that’s a conversation for another time.
With this blog, I had to have an actual “Come to Jesus” meeting with Jesus.
First things first, I had to repent. This blog was something that God actually called me to do. He selected me for this and thought that I was the woman for the job to reflect who He is through my writing. How dare I make it feel like this is something that I have to do! This is something that I get to do and it should be treated as a privilege, even if it is hard sometimes.
Second, I told God that even though I had royally messed up with not blogging and hiding out from those who needed to hear a word from you, I would give my blog over to you. I’d surrender my blog to Him and whether He would give me a second chance or not, I would be okay with it because it’s all in His hands.
Third, I also told God that I want Him to be the one to run the blog, not me. I want Him to guide me as I prayerfully seek His direction in what to write and what to post.
After many losses, disappointments, and mistakes, God graciously gives me a second chance and I’m grateful because to be honest, I didn’t deserve one. AT ALL. I still don’t know what His will is for me regarding this blog because it’s going to look totally different from how I was running it before but I’m just glad that I get to do it again.
Again… That word alone is drenched in grace.
It’s interesting how we tend to disqualify ourselves because of the mistakes that we’ve made in the past, especially the ones that are repeated over and over. Now, I do believe that God is gracious but I’ve also seen the side of Him where He’ll send someone else to do what we refuse to do without repentance.
God is definitely a God of giving second, second chances. I’m so grateful for that because while I was writing myself off, He was still writing my story so He can get me to tell His story through my writing.
I thank God for the grace and space to grow through this. I also thank God that He was willing to accept my willing heart. I know that Him and I are going to have to work on the trust a little more but He gave me a second chance.
Maybe you feel like you’re too far gone or done for God to redeem you because of past mistakes, loss, disappointments, or circumstances that happened. God can and will still use you.
If you have:
A willing and repentant heart
A desire to surrender to Him (even when you want to do a death grip on the things you hold near and dear)
A love for God
You’re never too far gone or done for God to use you in an impactful way. He is a God of second (second) chances. Where would we be without His grace and second chances?
Have you every felt like you were too far gone or done for God to use you? How has God given you a second chance? Comment below.
